Saturday, January 31, 2009

I have been struggling very hard before making this decision.

I have decided to stop playing netball. This is really a tough decision. I love netball. I have been playing it for 5 years, but you guys have the eyes to see that I am not a good player. Never was and never will. JL is right, I will never be a good player. My size is already a big disadvantage. I will not achieve anything if I continue. JL asked me to concentrate on Umpiring, but it is not what I want. I want to play the game. I want to be part of the team when we win. I want to cry with the team when lose. Honestly,I never had the sense of belonging to the team, whether in Extremes or even Henderson. I was never the reason why they won and never even the reason why they lost, because my role in the team was just to cheer and to entertain. Seriously speaking, even if I look happy in the team, they are all just to disguise all my unhappiness. I enjoyed trngs is because I can see my frens. I know where my limit is. I know no matter how hard I trained, I will never exceed others in the team. I started the race later than others, the chances of me winning is very little or maybe impossible.

Netball, has been in my life for 5 years, I am letting go now. I am tired already. I am sorry JL, Mr Bok. I have let you down. You guys have seen me grown through the years and now I am giving up. You guys have gave me guidance and opportunities. I am sorry. I just want to do smth else, other than netball. Smth that will give me the sense of belonging. I am useless and I am really very sorry.
Bye.

Friday, January 30, 2009

You are so mean.

JL just called me. She ask me to not quit EXTREMES. She told me lots of stuffs. She told me that she is tired and wants to wash her hands off this matter. I feel so guilty. I wanna tell her that I am sorry and I will cont'd to go for Netball, but, I will never succeed in the team. Even she say so. I have to be determine on my decision. I am quitting and that's it.
Bye.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

I want it, BADLY!

How?! Tomorrow will be the release of our Poly allocation. I want to go SP, badly. I even chose the CCA already ( no more netball). Pray hard. SP, I want you.
Bye.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Woots woots.

JQ and Char came over to my hse for steamboat.
Bye.

Monday, January 26, 2009


TEN ARE YOUS
1. Are you single - Yes
2. Are you happy - Yes
3. Are you bored - Yes
4. Are you fair - Yes
5. Are you Italian - Yes
6. Are you intelligent - Yes
7. Are you honest - Yes
8. Are you nice - Yes
9. Are you Irish - Yes
10. Are you Asian - Yes

TEN FACTS
1. Full Name - Yap Ting Ting
2. Best Friends - Nicole, Ashley, Melody, Kimberly and Jessica, also Angelina
3. Birth place - Hospital ward
4. Hair color - Currently, Red ar
5. Natural hair style - just hair la
6. Eye Color - Hazel Brown
7. Birthday - 29 August 1991
8. Cuteness- 10/10
9. Favorite color- ROY G BIV

10. One place you'd like to visit - My best friends' hse, although I have been there umpteen times


TEN THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE
1. Have you ever been in love - Yes.
2. Do you believe in love at first sight - Yes
3. Do you currently have a crush? - No
4. Have you ever been hurt emotionally - Yes, when Char appears in frnt of me
5. Have you ever broken someone's heart - Cannot, police will catch
6. Have you ever had your heart broken - Oh ya, I was hospitalized that time. The doctors had a hard time putting them back.
7. Have you ever liked someone but never told them - Yes
8. Are you afraid of commitment - No
9. Who was the last person you hugged - My sis, we were fighting
10. Who was the last person you said I love you to? - My best friends, they called, and I told them.

TEN THIS OR THAT
1. Love or lust - Love.
2. Hard liquor or beer - Mix them together
3. Cats or dogs - CatDog
4. A few best friends or any regular friends - As I mentioned, above
5. Creamy or Crunchy - Crunchy
6. Pencil or Pen - Pencil in pen
7. Wild night out or romantic night in - Make it wild baby!
8. Money or Happiness - Money than happiness
9. Night or day - Night
10. IM or phone - Phone, I can express myself better verbally. Words are dead, no doubt.

TEN HAVE YOU EVER
1. Been caught sneaking out -No
2. Seen a polar bear -Yes
3. Done something you regret - Yes
4. Bungee jumped - No
5. Eaten food that fell on the floor - Yes. Babies, you know, they eat practically everything frm anywhere.
6. Finished an entire jaw breaker - I dunno what is that
7. Been caught naked - No
8. Wanted an ex bf/gf back -No
9. Cried because you lost a pet - No
10. Wanted to disappear - Yes

TEN PREFERENCES IN A PARTNER

1. Smile or eyes - Smile
2. Light or dark hair - make it blonde
3. Hugs or kisses - In the end also sex
4. Shorter or taller - Taller
5. Intelligence or attraction - Intelligence.
6. Topman or Zara - Topman.
7. Funny or serious - Funny.
8. Older or Younger - I am fine wit anything
9. Outgoing or quiet - Outgoing
10. Sweet or Bad - Salty

TEN HAVE YOUS
1. Ever performed in front of a large crowd - Yes
2. Ever talked on the phone for longer than an hour - Yes
3. Ever tried walking on your hands -My hands are to small for me to walk on.
4. Ever been to a rock concert - Noise Pollution
5. Ever been on a cheerleading team - No
6. Ever been on a dance team - No
7. Ever been on a sports team - Dun rmbr
8. Ever been in a drama play/production - My life is my stage
9. Ever owned a BMW, Mercedes Benz, Escalade, Hummer or Bentley? - Ya, toy ones
10. Ever been in a rap video? - No.

LASTS

1. Last phone call you made -Mummy
2. Last person you hugged - Mentioned abv
3. Last person you hung out with - Family
4. Last time you worked - Thurs
5. Last person you talked to - Grandma
6. Last person you IM'd - Vanessa
7. Last person you texted - Nicole
8. Last person(s) you went to the movies with - The indo gang
9. Last person/thing you missed - My bolster
10. Last website visited - Mai blog


TEN... PEOPLE TO DO THIS
ten pple

Friday, January 23, 2009

Sure fail!

I went for the umpire's theory test ytd. I can tell you, I will sure fail the paper. It was a 1½ hr paper but I finished it in 15 mins. The paper was fking difficult, worst than 'O' lvl paper la. After the paper, went to Kallang Leisure Park, ALONE. Shop ard for my family and fking spent 70 over dollars. Kinda heart pain, but than their thanks healed it all.
Bye.


Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Great time.

Went all the way down to Pasir Ris to meet the two bitches, Char and JQ. They were late for 30 whole mins ( or maybe even more). That was when I know GV has actually moved to Jurong huh. -_-". I was so pissed waiting for them, but oh well, we met after so long. Haha. The always-so- forgiving me, forgave them. Aren't they lucky to have a friend lyk me? OF COURSE! Haha. We went to E!hub for the not- so- delicious dinner and went to Pasir Ris beach to chill. Actually before we decided going to the beach, our always- not- so- funny friend, Charmaine, cracked a very funny joke:
Me: So where we gng now?
JQ: ( as usual) I dunno.
Me: How abt Pasir Ris beach?
Char: Neh (pointing at JQ), Pasir Ris bitch. Haha.
JQ: -_-"
Me: Not bad ar.
Quite funny right, for Char's standard. Haha.
Bye.



Full of enviousness.

Went to watch Changeling wit Jess, Rea and Siska The movie was wonderful. Great story, great actress( Angelina Jolie) and great audience( ME). This
movie is HIGHLY recommended by me, seriously. Go watch it!
















Bye.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Do you know how to appreciate me?

Damn it. I can't believe what Char said, is actually the truth. It is really difficult to give up smth you really love, for my case, netball. Just got back frm umpiring course. I realised how much I love the game. I can't give up. It is tough. I miss Char and JQ. They are lyk so busy with zonal and sch. We hardly meet, and they are not coming for trngs and I will not gng for trngs too. It will be so tough for us to meet up. Some more, they are preparing for 'O' lvls this year. This makes them busier. I have so much to tell them.
Bye.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

How does it feel to be a star in the sky?

I am utterly disappointed with JL. When I was told that she is very bias, I actually fought for her. I never won, cos what they say was the fact. I have decided to take a break frm netball. Stop playing for a while. Maybe, this will be better for me. Away frm stress and the ugly side of humans. JL had done a lot for me. I will not forget it, but for now, I just want to stop and take a break. I am sorry mates. When I am ready, I will be back on court. again.

This is just another empty post.
Bye.



Someone, listen to my silent screams.

Had trng just now. Suddenly had a thought, " why am I trng? I am nowhere better than anyone in the team. My presence is only to entertain. I know, the team needs me, to make them laugh." I am so disappointed with myself. I am already considered as a senior player. Played netball for 5 years. Any achievements? None. I am a total loser, failure. I can never be better than anyone. I am fat and slow. I am just a burden to the team. My existence in the team is a disgrace to everyone. I can only do stupid things to make pple laugh. Haha. Well, at least I can make pple laugh. Applause for that. Haha. Netball... Why am I trng? The team does not need me. They can do better without me. They can just easily find replacement for me. Someone who can make them laugh and play well at the same time. I am just a burden. In Henderson, in Extremes, I am just one extra one. I hate myself. I want to hide myself somewhere, somewhere pple cannot find me. Slowly, they will forget that I actually exist. I will be erased off their memory. I will miss them but they will forget me. This is the ending where everyone will be happy except for me.
This is a empty post.
Bye.


Friday, January 16, 2009

stickwitu forever.

My menses is here. I feel so emo la. Haix. I feel so sad, cos I am fat. I wanna be lyk Nicole ( my goddess). I wanna be lyk her, so hot and sexy and have a fking hot bf. She can sing, dance and she is hot. How can?! I will give myself till August, before my b'dae, I wanna be lyk her. Wait and see la.


















Read that bitch's blog( second link on top frm left). Read wad she wrote. I tell you, she is just plain jealous, cos she is
STUPID!!

Bye.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Three Cheers!!

I am so happy! This post is a lil late but well, haha! I did well for my O lvls peeps. As compare to scholars who got all A's, I got all B's and 1 A la. This result is so fking unexpected. I thought I would get C's and B's or whatsoever. I am so grateful to my teachers in sch. Their continuous preachings really did help me, and seeing them not giving up on me even though I am so hopeless, really makes me feel so touched. Teachers really are very noble personnels. I salute u!
Bye.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

I am terrified.

I am so scared. The results are coming out already. I don't know how I will score. All As'? All F's? I am so stress. Sometimes, in the middle of the night, I will be awaken by the fear. AIYA!! Someone, help me can?
Bye.

Monday, January 5, 2009

I do have feelings, you know?

As usual, I went to work early in the morning, but today is lyk the worst day. I was arranging the books as ordered, and I needed plastic bags. I asked the aunty," can you please pass me that box of plastic bags?" Her answer was," go get it yourself. So fat still so lazy. No wonder pple say don't hire fat pple." I was lyk, WTF. If she seriously do not want to pass me the box of plastic bags, just reject me la. Does she has to be so nasty and add those words behind? She claims that I am lazy. So who was the one who packed 35 sets of NT books, 70 sets of NA books and 4 boxes of art materials ALONE?! ME leh!! ITS ME, ME and ME!! DID SHE HELP? NO!!! SHE NEVER EVEN OFFER TO HELP. ALL SHE COULD WAS TO COMPARE AND COMPARE AND COMPARE ME WITH HER EX-WORKERS. I am fine if she never recognize my hard works but does she have to hurt me with those words. I swear at that instance, I feel lyk crying so much. I never wanted to be fat. Don't think she know ar.
Bye.



How I wish...

Watched the news and got to know that Israel had invaded Gaza. Imagine how many people will be implicated, how many innocent lives will be killed. Haix.

Had Extremes trng last night, it was damn tiring la. I saw Esther cry AGAIN! Haha. She is lyk a tap sia but I guess she is feeling better already. Cheer up la, and get a plumber to fix the tap.
Bye.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Tough times.

Its 2009 already. I feel so fking old. I am turning 18 in 7 mths time. So sad la. Oh well. Lets have a recap of what happened to me LAST YEAR:
- Promoted to 4e2
- Fking dropped my Amaths after "kind" advices frm my "cutest" maths teacher MRS GOH YAU TAI
- The closure of my dearest HSS netball (don't be too happy, we will be back! I am telling you, CJQ and those teams who lost to us a lot of times)
- Joined TEAM EXTREMES
- Made new (weird) friends
- My grandfather passed away
- Got A2 for my CHINESE!!
- Took my 'O' lvls
- Went for the world's worst prom EVER!
- Grown FAT!( I fking hate this)
Guess these is all. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Bye.

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